Friday, June 27, 2014


On Friday, June 13th (our 6th anniversary (Go, us!), and my little sister's 21st birthday (Go, Laura!)), I called my oncologist to see if he had the results from two MRI's I had gone in for earlier in the week. He hemmed and hawed and asked if I could come in on Monday to get the results, "Oh, and bring Adam."

That bodes well, right?

The weekend was spent doing mental "worse-case-scenario" exercises, all while trying to distract ourselves from those ever-darkening thoughts. We went bowling, had pizza, played at the park, and attended church.

Monday morning we showed up for our scheduled execution, or at least that's what it felt like. The news was, as expected, not good. The last year of radiation, chemo, surgery, more chemo, more radiation, and boatloads of various medications seems to have missed a couple of key areas: my spinal cord, and my brain.

As we left the doctor's office, the clouds opened in a heavy downpour, as if the world itself wept alongside us. My oncologist doesn't expect me to last even six more months. It could be as few as two or three.

We are so grateful for the people who have rallied around us during this difficult time. Our wonderful ward has lifted and strengthened us. Our families have sent prayers, love, and financial support, as well as offers to come help. We have basically canceled all future plans and as soon as possible we'll be heading back to Utah to spend time with family. A huge thank you to everyone who has helped us with meals, packing, childcare, emotional support, prayers, and thoughtful notes. We don't know what we would've done without you.


Mom Walton said...

I am so grateful to have you in our family, and so sad at your news. I look forward to having you and your family back in Utah. Love you

Dad Walton said...

Bonnie, you are precious to us. We do look forward to having you back with us.

brittney perry said...

Hey Bon - thank you for keeping us posted. I'm so glad you can go home to be with your family right now, and I hope you know how much I love you too. Still sending prayers your way.

r o y a l said...

I hope this posts - I keep trying and failing, or maybe I've commented ten times.... but I'm terrible with words, but I just want you to know that I love you and am still praying for you. Thanks for courageously keeping us updated and for your example of strength. Please Let me know if I can help you with anything. You are amazing. For realzies.

Karen said...

Bonnie, my love and prayers are with your sweet family.

Laura said...

Oh Bonnie. You are so amazing. I love you and I'm praying for you and your family.

Whitney Hardie said...

Bonnie, this sucks. I wish I could be more positive, but I'm just too damn sad and angry.

I'm glad you will be with family and mountains and everything that feels like home. I miss our summer picnics and....I just don't know what else to say.

Love to you and Adam and the kids.